All About Me

This year was all about me. I never thought of anyone else but me. Selfish as it sounds, it feels good to think about me sometimes. After few years of helping my family, I finally decided to think about me. And I thought that finally thinking about me was better. I thought wrong. I chased a dream to work abroad. And I just realized that dreaming about it was so much better than reality. I went home, empty-handed and feeling defeated. I thank God for giving me with a very understanding family. They had welcomed and not a single blame was uttered.

After a month of staying in Cebu, I acted on something impulsive. I flew to Manila for work leaving my beloved Anferny behind again. Until now I still could not understand why I chose to be here. But it is here that I totally understand the essence of sacrifice. I am no longer living in the comforts of home. And it is here that I found a new love after a tragic love loss. Choosing between options, a past love that puts me on a pedestal, a young love who never promised anything but a rollercoaster of intense emotions and a mature love that gave me an indescribable feeling. Choosing the last option is very uncertain decision but I willingly took the chances.

Year 2010 gave me a lot of heartaches and frustrations – career loss because of jealousy, unfulfilled dream, love loss, separation anxiety from my family however it gave me more – strangers who became friends, strength from my family and unforgettable and forgettable experiences that made me stronger and wiser.

To 2011, let me find what I am looking for and I ask time to give me time to grow up.

And to my new so called home Makati – you are not Cebu and I can’t always get what I want but I know God will give me what I need in order to survive this concrete jungle.