Looking Back

The year is finally over. I haven't noticed December pass by swiftly. Time indeed is relative. It's too short when you have so much to do and too long when you're waiting for nothing.

I've looked back for the past year. And still, I haven't done anything spectacular like discovering a new planet or having a cure for cancer. However I've grown a lot. I've learnt to be independent, the importance of acceptance and the sense of fulfillment.

Listed on my new year's resolution, there were a lot plans that didn't materialize. Yes, I haven't bought insurance as planned because for some unfortunate reason: my sister was retrenched so I had to send my brother to school, all by myself. I wasn't able to go to culinary school because mum asked me to help in our household finances. Still, still, still, looking at Buchok (my nephew) and Martin (my brother) gives me a sense of pride and fulfillment -- a feeling that is hard to replace. And looking at myself at the mirror reflects a street-smart, strong-willed, mature woman.

Nevertheless, there are so many things that I am thankful for.

Travel:

• travelled to Malaysia and Singapore.
• partied at Bantayan Island
• rediscovered and snorkelled in Biliran Island
• been to Antulang Beach where Ryan A proposes to Judy Ann
• visited Ria in Manila

Experience:

• lived alone and proved to myself that I can do it
• let doctor fish nibble at my feet
• dined at posh restos
• learned that not all help is rewarded
• rediscovered Louis, the genuine, that mum gave me
• had a skywalk adventure

Community:

• will be cooking for 50 orphans
• visited the dying elderly
• helped save mother earth through recycling plastics

I've got toys too:

• I got Rob
• bought a new cellphone, Pink
• will buy a new lappy not that I'm replacing Pooch
• bought half a dozen shoes in a span of 6 months

And for the dreams unfulfilled yet, there is still next year. For now, I am thankful that I still have a job. And after a decade of soul-searching, I finally have a dream.